Monday, October 26, 2009

On Hiatus

Well I am not sure if anyone is still reading this blog.

I could make a list of why I haven't posted but honestly I've had to distance myself from infertility to live.

Those of us suffering with infertility know the all consuming hold it has on every aspect of my life. For me this was especially true. Focusing on my infertility really caused me to loose joy in my life. So much of my time was spent living in the past and "what ifs"

I really let go of living infertile land...

That's not too say I don't live with the pain everyday. May is especially hard for me. Seeing babies/children that are the age of a child I didn't have still hurts.

My youngest brother's wife is pregnant. I was able to take the news and utter a faked "Congratulations!" for him. I kept myself together on the phone and cried when I called my husband. The pain is still there and will be there forever. Learning to live beyond it is the challenge we all face.

I've been able to move on. I haven't given up my journey. I am only postponing it.

Hope you're all well and learning to move through the pain...