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Monday, March 10, 2008

A Special Gift

** Warning: post mentions birth, babies, and mommies.**

My friend Bella gave me two of the greatest gifts this past Friday.

First, she allowed me to be present at the birth of her daughter. This has been such an amazing and eye opening gift. I will always treasure this gift and thank her from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to share in the special day!

Bella was induced on Friday and I was able to watch her journey through labor to the birth of her daughter. For those of you who have already taken this journey: WOW! For those of you who have yet to experience this life changing event: IT'S AMAZING.

Bella was so strong and brave. I admire her and am so proud of her!

My god-daughter was born into this world with a full head of hair and the cutest poutiest lips I've ever seen! She's a tiny little peanut and so alert. Of course she's beautiful! An angel come to earth!

Bella is having difficulty breastfeeding. Her milk hasn't come in yet and her colostrum is gone! Any words of wisdom would be appreciated --I'll pass it all on to her.

I want to be with her every day! I can't wait to watch her grow into a strong, happy little girl.

The second gift Bella gave me was to ask me to be her daughter's Godmother. I am so honored to be chosen for this very special title. The Spanish have a wonderful word for Godmother. It is comadres. Co -mothers. I am awed and honored beyond words. During the birth Bella's mother kept calling us comadres. Hearing that just fills me with so much love and joy. It is such a special gift.

I am so blessed to have so many babies in my life. I have my nephew, little button; my Goddaughter, peanut; and very soon my new niece.

The pain of infertility is still there. It still stings and I still hear; "See, this is what you can't have". It's not as loud and my love for my babies muffles the shouting pain to a whisper. I still feel it and still know it's pain but I also know the joy and beauty of having children in my life. I will not let infertility steal that joy from me.

I WILL NOT.

7 comments:

JJ said...

I am welling up with tears for you--but tears of joy! What a special gift your friend gave you--being there for the birth AND being Godmother! Congrats=) How very special for you!

Bea said...

I'm so glad your friend has chosen to share this with you. I often think that if people weren't so possessive about their children infertility would have less of an impact on those who suffer. Your friend sounds like she has the self-confidence and generosity of heart to let other people love her little one, too.

Congrats on being a Godmother!

As for breastfeeding, I can only tell you stuff I read in a book. First of all, it says to feed more or less continually for the first week. If baby is sleepy, this might mean some gentle waking up, but usually baby will want to feed nearly all the time, perhaps in short bursts only. Exhausting, but totally normal and this phase doesn't last too long.

It warns that if you do this your breasts won't feel full so you might worry that your milk isn't in, whereas it is, you're just draining it constantly as you're supposed to. You should instead assess the number of stools to see if baby is getting enough. Also, watch the weight, but do this at your peds, because you need really accurate scales and the ones you can buy aren't good enough. Babies are allowed to lose a certain amount of weight at first, but if bubs is losing too much, look into the feeding.

Latch problems are the most common thing, apparently. She might need a lactation consultant to check her latch?

If in doubt, see a lactation consultant, the sooner the better.

That's all I know.

Bea

Yetty said...

i love your attitude Jenny. I just had a similar experience in January with my SIL and I agree with you, its totally awesome. Stay joyful

Thalia said...

what a lovely experience, I'm so pleased you got to share that.

Kellie with an "ie" said...

Congratulations on your new Goddaughter! Your post and its' abundant joy made me smile.

Anonymous said...

About the problem with breast feeding: There is a natural remedy that works very well. It's a tea called "Mother's Milk" made by a company called Traditional Medicinals. You can find it at Whole Foods or most health food stores. It worked for my sister when nothing else would.

Mandy said...

I only came across your blog in a google search, but loved what you wrote in this entry. The ending is beautiful, and a wonderful reminder to not let your infertility steal your joy. I know all too well how easy it is to allow such a situation to cause you to focus on what you don't have rather than what you do. Thanks for the reminder, from a stranger. :-)