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Friday, September 01, 2006

One or the Other

You may recall me mentioning that Harry and I were looking at the housing market. Hoping to move from our too small two bedroom apartment into a home. We we're all set, we even found a property that we qualified for and we're ready to make an offer!

Until we remembered IVF

See our IVF expenses don't show up on a credit report...

What we pay for medication, co-pays, and insurance....

Our IVF expenses make up the difference that we would need each month to pay the mortgage.

It's one or the other

IVF or a mortgage...

We've wanted our own home for so long now and have really been over burdened financially... just when we see our way out of it.. bang! Ha ha ah!

did we really think ANYTHING would come easy for us...

Our options

a maybe baby in an apartment (cause there is no guarantee that we'll EVER get pregnant)

or childless in a home

11 comments:

Just another Jenny said...

Oh Jenny, what an awful choice to make. I pray this FET works so you can have your house and your baby. Just once it would be nice for something to work out - that would seem fair wouldn't it?

seattlegal said...

I'm sorry you have to make such a decision. It's times like these that I really wish that IVF was covered by insurance more! We shouldn't have to make these decisions.

N said...

Oh I understand you so well, although we are not paying much for the treatment, we live in a little box apartment and desperately need more space, especially if there is ever a baby coming.

However I guess it's better to live in a shoebox with a baby than in a palace all alone, right?

Good luck anyways, especially with the upcoming FET. I keep it all so crossed for you. You deserve this so bad!

Hugs!

Nina

Angie said...

Damn Jenny, I'm sorry! Whatever will you decide? I hope you can figure this out and still be sane!

Jamie said...

Buy the house. Fix it up on your own. Have the house reappraised and get a home equity loan to pay for your IVF. This is what we are doing. We bought our house 3 years ago and found out we were infertile about a year and a half ago. We were able to get a home equity loan of $48,000. At the rate we are going it probably still won't be enough but at least we have something to borrow against and have made money on our investment (our home). Paying rent is throwing money away. At least with a home you will be gaining as the market increases.

Bea said...

Well, it's not right you should have to choose.

But I'd go for maybe baby in an apartment, every time.

Maybe babies are so very precious - and they're all we've got. I think it's good to take care of them. Homes get boring.

Bea

Jo said...

It is a tough choice. We ended up doing what Jamie did. We also do not have insurance coverage. So we financed IVF through a home equity loan.
We get to deduct the medical bills and meds plus the interest is tax deductable. For some reason spending that money isnt as hard. We bought a 5 bedroom house and it ended up working ok because we now have custody of DH's 2 children as of 2 weeks ago.

Hopefully this will all be moot and your FET will work : )

Spanglish said...

Jamie is very wise. There is NO REASON you can't try to have both. It's unfair to throw your money away on rent. Just because you buy a house doesn't mean it's the end of IF treatment. It may prolong things a bit, but in the long run having a house is the same as having money... and money is so much a part of what we need in this whole maybe baby endeavor.

GLouise said...

Oh sweetie.

Anonymous said...

Jenny have enjoyed reading your blog. I am in the same boat. We are 33 and have debt now which we are paying off over the next year. My husband wants to buy a house first and then do IVF. I see it differently. I seriously don't know what to do. We don't have much in retirement (just a few thousand) and my RE said it would cost anywhere between 9K - 13K. I know people who have sold their homes to finish their IVF cycles. Why would we try to buy a house now. I can't stand another year in our 1 bedroom box but I want a baby and if the IVF doesn't work, I want to be able to afford international adoption. How are we suppose to figure this out?
Good luck in your journey.

surrogatemother said...

I am totally agree with seattlegal.